Choosing Among Gift Basket Options

Giftbaskets are soooo last year!  Or is it last decade?  Actually, I hope the correct response is neither.  (Lock it in; that’s my final answer.)  I’m actually a gift food merchant.  Kind of has a special ring to is, doesn’t it?  Granted, it may be less significant that solving the global warming problem or removing a pesky mouse from under your kitchen cabinet, but it’s an honest way to pay for the roof over my family’s head.

I can read your mind: “I’ll bet he never has a problem deciding what to give during the holidays; he just gives the same boring baskets year after year to everyone.”  How dare you think about me in that way!  In fact, I face the same dilemmas that you face during any gift giving, decision making crisis.

I do not give food filled bundles of joy to my entire gift list.  (Well, maybe most it.)  Even if I did just give gift baskets to everyone, my choice would be only marginally easier than yours.  My company alone offers scores of fruit baskets, wine gift baskets, gourmet food options and far more.  (I can hear you right now, begging me to tell you where this wonderful store is.  Please be patient.)

Before you bribe me (or threaten me) to share my store location with you, I want to tell you about my own decision making approach.

First, I decide on an appropriate category of gift.  If Uncle Milton has his drinking problem under control for the first time in ten years, I should not even consider the wine baskets.  Instead, I’ll opt for a fruit basket with something seasonal.  After years of ignoring the nutritional value of what he consumed, he could use a few extra servings of fruit in solid form.

Dear, dear Aunt Mildred is a great wine talker.  I don’t think she truly enjoys sipping her wine, but she loves to try to impress everyone with what she knows about it.  She thrills to have a new member of her audience so that she can explain what makes a good vintage year, the varieties of grapes that are used in her favorite blends and, especially, how much she paid for each bottle (as well as how much she paid for the carpeting you just ruined by spilling your glass).  I’ll give her one of my better wine gift baskets, but I refuse to give her the best stuff.  Sure, I get it wholesale, but I still have to pay for it!

My nephew, Alfred, recently married his long time girlfriend.  Frankly, it’s about time.  It took him eight years to decide that she was worth parting with enough money to pay for a diamond and another five when he found out that it is customary to pay the minister who performs the ceremony.  What he wants is a check.  Well, he’s not getting that from me.  Instead, they’re getting a meal of live lobsters and the trimmings from me.  Actually two, of course.  I figure it’s the only way to get that cheap guy’s new bride out of the kitchen for an evening.  (They honeymooned by visiting me!)

Second, I decide how much I’m willing to spend on these losers.

My grandson is getting the latest video game system.  Let’s face it; he is truly special.